Opening the tool box- I lost my toes!

It has been an insane few months. I have had so little time (actually, I still don't have time! The PIp is still going strong and climbing Mt. Mama with great glee). I'm going on several terrible nights of sleep, and four hours of broken ugliness in the last 24 hours.

Add to it stresses of being a grown up, bills, car troubles, and a 3 year old (enough said)... Oh and then add to that health issues rearing their ugly head. Some of these were snowballed in thanks to sleep deprivation and stress. But also from a gluten exposure I just couldn't figure out. Gluten makes me ragey and anxious. Gluten makes my gut scream. Gluten makes me oh so sick. It also makes break out in itchy little blisters called dermatitis herpetiformis. Gluten sucks.

This is a rough time. 

I have felt so very stuck. Actually I've felt kind of buried in small children screaming in my ears. My stern expectations saying I need to do more. Children's behavior screaming I need to do more. Feeling pretty much like a burnt out grump of a Mama.

It's doggy paddle time, and no and if or buts about it. That humbling time where you truly realize that

Reflecting on Parenting... Personalities...And Food Allergies

We have some sickies in the house (cold and cough) and so I cannot believe that I am the first one awake (well, besides Hubby getting ready for work!). My early birds are usually up at the crack of dawn! So I am taking this time to get some thing out real quick.

As I was laying there in the dark I was reflecting on how much Pip is growing. She is fourteen months now and she is changing so much. I was thinking about my experience with all my babies, and how she is probably my quirkiest one yet!

Everyone wants to have an easy baby, one that eats and sleeps well -nothing wrong with that. I desperately wanted that. My oldest was quite an education on what babies could be - and it wasn't on the "easy" spectrum, at all!

Roo 6mos

 She had colic and we had a nine week nightmare of learning to breastfeed. She was in general a very intense baby, who woke often and never napped well, in her first year. This is how she napped most of her first year:

Well generally not outside... ;0)

 And then she blossomed into this fantastic, fun, sweet, amiable little toddler. She napped an hour and a half daily from fifteen months to...Well, even now at FIVE she still takes a good long nap a few days a week.
She of course had her whiny and very intense teething months

Let it Roll...Preschool Style...

You know, as draining as it can be, I love the baby stage. Apart from colic and the hours Hubby and I have spent passing fussy upset baby back and forth: I still love the baby stage. Okay, I hate teething too, and all the night waking that involves.  But still: Baby sad? There is almost always a simple solution.

Then toddlerhood arrives, it's a bit more work to calm them and help them stay content. The whining involved with cutting molars is pretty awful. But it's okay... Generally, some time nursing (or all your time nursing, as the case may be), a snuggle, getting outside- there are things that calm the wild teething beast.

And then they turn three. Joyous three! Boastful Three! Bright and curious THREE! Three year olds are so very quirky, the two I have experienced so far have these funny almost OCD rituals, and habits.

But you know what is the hardest part about three year olds (and some times this hits at 2 too...It did with my second)?

Eyes to See...You have ARRIVED!

Whenever I write a blog post I feel like I need to write some sort of "I hope I don't sound presumptuous- I'm 5 years in to this gig...This is coming from a heart that is learning...I don't claim to have any special..hmmm...Well, any thing. I write to process...And I've come up for air, so hang on!! Also, my spell check is UK English, so if some thing is spelled wrong- ha!"


It's been a very busy and full few months. We haven't gone anywhere much, or done any thing special. And yet it's felt so very busy. Most of that has been inside my head. I'm an internal processor and when I'm learning a lot, or feeling stretched, I climb inside my brain and baten down the hatch.

Which makes me think of a submarine or a bomb shelter...Let's stick with submarine. Some times I feel like I am going through life as a

Struggles...Are my Ally.

This month has been rough. About two weeks ago Hubby and Friendly both came down with the flu. Thankfully, Friendly's case wasn't too bad. She had a high fever (103+) for 3 days and a cough, was miserable but kept comfortable with Motrin. Hubby on the other hand was laid flat; high fever, horrible cough, and knocked out hard core for several days.
 Which left me solo parenting, dealing with a sleepless and teething baby, and praying I wouldn't get the flu too.

I didn't get it (wohoo!) But I came down with some thing else this weekend (sinus infection? virus? I'm still trying to decide). I am not nearly as miserable, but enough to be laid up on yesterday for the Pip Squeaks first Birthday.

Being sick, has also given me time to think- a luxury I haven't had in weeks.

What was I thinking about?

BALANCE

 Mostly how unfair it feels to me. Finding balance is such a struggle!
Sleep deprivation is super hard on any body...But especially mine...I try to brush it off...Soldier on, but it sucks. Add to it long standing autoimmune issues, anxiety and SAD and it has been an uphill battle for me this past month.

I read some thing a friend shared the other day that really impacted me.

New ...Year...

This has probably been my longest break from blogging in a few years. It has been a busy few months...One with little time spent in introspection.

But I just had "coffee" (I drank  Synergy Mango Kombucha- if you haven't discovered it yet, try some so yummy!) with a friend, we talked about so many things, and I am feeling some bloginess coming on.

The Holidays were wonderful...

We celebrated a special advent

Advent calender (a blog post on this coming soon!)

And Roo Girl turned 5

Pup Cakes at our Puppy Party

Embracing Your Energy....And Parenting With Respect For It.

Okay, that was a long kind of weird title.

But this has been some thing on my heart for the past year or so. It has been a huge part of keeping my eyes on my own work. A key to my ultimate daily goal of being present.

INTROVERT? EXTROVERT?
Most of my life I thought that introverts were "shy" and "quiet" people and that extroverts were "friendly" "loud",  and "out going".. 

I thought I was an extrovert until about 5 years ago. I love people  I consider myself a fairly friendly person and I can be very outgoing in the right situations.

It wasn't until I read Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka that I had the light bulb moment: I am an introvert!

In her book Kurcinka explains that introversion and extroversion have nothing to with shyness or friendliness.